Awakening to the Splendor of Dawn Beckoning of The Light Unto Healing from PTSD

This is an autobiographical collection of poems, prose and music about the author's tortuous path to adulthood as she recovers from severe PTSD. It chronicles her journey from victim to survivor and now, within sight of conqueror. (PTSD - Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - It is what remains and destroys normal life after overwhelming, unresolved trauma finally affects one's every step and breath. Every voice, every sound, odor, flash of light can trigger a fight or flight or panic reaction. Adrenaline rushes through the body and irrational fear can rule every hyper-vigilant moment of life. Nightmares replace sleep. An otherwise physically healthy person becomes totally disabled. And well-intentioned ignorant observers tell you to, "Just get over it.") The author was adopted from Korea as an infant with severe, undetected medical problems that affected her behavior. She was repeatedly traumatized in her first adoptive home. Then at the age of ten she was sent away, never welcome to return, and further traumatized in hospitals, group homes and foster care. Multiple suicide attempts led to more hospitalizations and abuse by a seemingly endless number of training-challenged people. This book weaves a background story of spiritual and relational growth. It chronicles her undying and persistent prayer - from early childhood - that one day she would be part of a Christian family who would want her and love her and cherish her. A story about how that prayer was answered five years ago when she was adopted a second time and given the chance to grow and heal from the horrors of the past. It is a story of the ascendancy of her relationship with the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob and the gradual unfolding and awareness of who she is while she struggles to cast off deep emotional numbness and begin to feel and express love. One theme runs through these pages - the author's love of God and how it has brought her through the toughest of times and is still guiding her through her daily battles as she recovers from the trials of PTSD.